Tag: healthcare

6 things one labor & delivery nurse wants you to know about delivering during a pandemic

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Let’s face it, the world as we know it is a scary place right now. We’re told to stay home with a stockpile of food and toilet paper, wear masks and stay away from loved ones or else we may get ourselves or someone we love very, very sick. For many, the stay at home order is inconvenient, for a lot, it’s devastating for their financial well being, and for pregnant mothers, it’s all that plus terrifying, upsetting, and downright unfair.

For mothers nearing their due date, I want to personally say my heart breaks for you. Giving birth is a life changing experience that is a bit scary even in “normal” times. Throwing a pandemic in the mix certainly adds unneeded stress, anxiety and fear to what should be an exciting and joyful time. I know this isn’t what you planned, but please know so many people are rooting for you and think you’re very, very brave.

In an effort to ease the worry of expectant mothers, I caught up with my friend Jessica, a BSN, RN working in the OB, Postpartum unit at a South Florida hospital through these unprecedented times. During our chat, I asked her some questions that many expectant mothers have concerns about. It’s important to note that these answers stand true for the hospital she works at, but are a good reference overall. Since I personally gave birth during a different time, I polled a few friends that are currently pregnant, and most of these questions came directly from them.

1. Are the birthing person or support person required to BYOM (Bring your own mask?) Will the mother be required to wear a mask at all times, even during labor? 

Currently, literally everyone is wearing a mask 24/7. I can only speak for our hospital, but we currently have enough PPE to provide to the mom and support person. We all know it is very hard to breathe during labor, let alone with a mask on so all we can do is recommend it. Do all moms continue to wear the mask? No, but that is her choice to refuse our recommendations. You have the right to refuse any medical treatment at any time.

2. What are the main differences in the L&D ward now vs. prior to Covid

Our OB unit is great because the entire floor (L&D, Postpartum, and NICU) is locked and not really connected to the rest of the hospital. Its always been very secure and strict with allowing visitors even before Covid. Currently, we (and Pediatrics) allow only 1 visitor, whereas the rest of the hospital allows none. Besides more PPE and only 1 visitor, our nurses still provide the same compassion and care to our patients.

3. Are new moms getting tested for Covid-19? If so, is it only if they’re showing symptoms?

We are screening both moms and fathers/support person. No one is tested unless they show symptoms.

4. Some expectant mothers have heard rumors that due to Covid 19, mothers will be discharged from the hospital just hours after delivery. Do you know if there is any truth behind this?

There is no truth to that at my hospital and I have not heard that in others. I think that is completely unrealistic and utterly unsafe. Most mothers havent even recovered enough to even get out of bed, let alone go home and take care of herself and her newborn.

That is the exact reason for the postpartum unit. To continue to take care of a mother and her baby. Most complications can happen 24-48 hours later. I do not foresee a discharge that quickly ever happening.

5. Do you feel that first time moms are at any disadvantage receiving some of the support new mothers usually receive at the hospital? For example, visits with lactation support?

We are still allowing lactation specialists to visit mothers. They are a part of our staff, and we believe breastfeeding is so important, so they are still seeing families.
I do think its unfair to the mothers who want/need a doula. I personally didnt use one during my birth, but I know the unbelievable support they provide for some mothers, that no one else can provide. So currently, our policy is only 1 support person allowed. Which usually is the father.

What is your message as a L&D nurse to birthing persons during this time?

We always want and – more importantly- need a mom to be flexible with her birth plan. We will respect every decision a mother makes and will educate as much as we can to help her make an informed decision. Things change hourly and even by the minute, things that are out of our control. Just be open and flexible. We will try our best to still make it the best experience possible. Come with the idea in your head of a safe delivery and happy healthy mom & baby.

Also, since there is only the dad allowed in the delivery room, make sure to give another nurse your phone/camera to take pictures! We love capturing the beautiful miracle and even more so now with no help from family or photographers.

The takeaway here, is your labor and delivery nurses will be there to support you through the most monumental moment of your life, just as they always would. They may have a little more PPE on, but know that they are smiling underneath that mask and ready to help you become a mom, or a mom again!

You got this mama!

 

 

 

 

To the mama in the thick of newborn life, I’m here to tell you it gets better. So much better.

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Anyone who knows me or who has read this blog, can probably guess I did not thrive in the newborn stage. It was hands-down the most difficult time of my life. So many people told me “enjoy every minute, you’re going to miss this…” and I HATED them for it.

I hated them because that statement, although meant to be harmless, made me feel so guilty that I wasn’t enjoying it. Did I enjoy cuddling that tiny, warm little baby that slept soundly (only) when on my chest? Absolutely. Was I in complete awe of him? Without a doubt. Did I love waking up to that tiny baby’s blood curdling cries every 45 minutes – 3 hours for weeks on end? Sure didn’t. There were women who actually told me, “But aren’t the 2 AM cuddles the sweetest?”

Um…No Sharon, as much as I appreciate the sentiment, 2 AM is not my favorite of all the cuddling time slots. Especially when they’re accompanied by 2 AM projectile spit up, wardrobe (and diaper) changes for both baby and I, and attaching my swollen, bloody boobs to a breast pump every night for weeks. Those nights were the nights I questioned everything.

I won’t carry on about the hardships of newborn life, because if you’re in it right now, I don’t need to remind you. But I will tell you that everyone said it would get better. That you will sleep again. That you will heal.  You won’t always need a plastic squirt bottle to accompany you to the toilet. You won’t always have a bag of frozen peas stuffed into your bra while you rock a screaming 6 pound baby that strangely resembles a roast chicken. That eventually, you’ll wash the spit up out of your hair, and you wont always be pinned beneath a (finally) sleeping baby on the couch, unable to move. I truly thought they were all full of shit, and this was my life now, and that they were all wrong.

But here I am. nearly 9 months into my motherhood journey, and I can tell you—things got better. SO. MUCH. BETTER. They were right. All those parents before me. It’s amazing what a little sleep can do for your mental state. Eventually, we fell into a rhythm. My body healed. We worked through kinks and food allergies and medical issues. Our chronically fussy newborn morphed into the happiest little cherub with the most delicious cheeks you’ve ever seen. I look at him every day and cry for a much different reason. It’s just incredible.  He’s just incredible. Watching him grow and change and learn every day, is just….There are no words to describe it.

Now, I’m thrilled to announce that I’m so incredibly happy. A happy, proud, beaming mama. The one I wanted to be from the beginning. It just took me a little bit to get here.

I didn’t love the newborn phase, and no, I don’t miss it. I miss him being that small, but I don’t miss the vulnurable chaos of it all. There, I said it. I don’t miss the exhaustion, or the fear, or how fragile my tiny baby was. I don’t miss how fragile I was either. I didn’t realize how fragile I was at the time, until I look back and see how far we’ve come, and how strong we are now. There is not a single photo of me with a big toothy-smiled grin until my baby was nearly 2 months old. It breaks my heart, but months 3-8 have been such a joyful sweet spot for us. The smiles, the milestones, the first giggles, the first foods… All the firsts… Did I mention the giggles? Although there are still learning curves and challenges every day, nothing compares to those first all-consuming weeks.

If you can survive the first few months—and you will, although you will question it every day—you will come out stronger than ever! adp_9578You’re a lot stronger than you think you are. Hang on mama, motherhood is a wild ride filled with seasons, and before you know it, that tough season you didn’t think you’d survive will be in your rearview.  Some seasons will feel like they will never end, but I’m here to tell you, they won’t last forever—promise.

How becoming a mom showed me gratitude

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Becoming a mom is one of the most incredible things to ever happen to me. It has been such a roller coaster of emotions that I’ve had a tough time processing them at times. It’s hard yet awesome. It’s exhausting yet most exhilarating thing ever. It makes you happy and sometimes sad, and sometimes I catch myself crying for no reason other than my brain is trying to keep up with all the emotions swirling around in my head.

But if there’s one emotion that has become the star of the show, its gratitude. Anxiety is a close second, but we’ll save that puppy for later. It may seem like I’m always whining about how hard it all is, but that’s because, well, it is hard. And by the way, hard does not always equal bad. But as hard is at may be, my son has single handedly showed me what it feels like to be hashtag blessed. I just stare at him in a complete awe and wonder how this tiny person that’s a mix of my husband and I is real. How his chubby cheeks and butt chin wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for the miracle that is procreation.

I know, I know. I used to hate those bitches who said that their hearts were just exploding with love. Or said having kids is like feeling your heart walk around on the outside of your body, but it’s freaking true. Damn. I hate when those bitches are right.

Going out to eat with a baby can be a little stressful. Sometimes your baby will cooperate through dinner, and sometimes they won’t. They’re babies. They cry sometimes. And generally the people around you are not super pumped about being near your crying baby. But sometimes when your baby cries in public, you don’t get rude looks and death stares, but instead, looks of empathy from grandmas who are missing their little ones, or a waitress who has been there.

Recently, I was out to dinner and my baby had a full diaper blow out. He was crying. I was sweating. I was trying not to cause a scene as I snuck away from the table (just as the food arrived of course, because #momlife). As I approached the restroom while holding a poop grenade just waiting to be detonated, I prayed to the good lord baby Jesus that this restaurant had a changing table. Thankfully it did. As I laid my baby out on the changing table, hair in my face, poo that resembled spicy mustard just waiting to make it’s great escape, baby cries echoing through the marble bathroom (those bathroom acoustics!), I struggled to get wipes out of the diaper bag that swung from my elbow. With one hand on the baby at all times, I exhaled as I finally finagled some wipes from the swinging trapeze of my diaper bag. And in that moment, a woman came up to me and offered a hand. I didn’t know this woman. I politely declined her help and genuinely thanked her. She looked me in the eyes and told me I was doing a great job and she remembered how hard it was like it was yesterday. I went home later that night and thought, I wish there were more people in this world like her. To the kind strangers in the world who make up for all the not so kind ones, I’m grateful for you.

Also, can we just say I’m grateful to public places with changing tables? No matter how gross, at least there’s a safe place to clean up your babe.

When our son needed an emergency grand entrance to the world during his birth, the doctors and nurses made sure he and I were safe and healthy. They also made sure we felt safe and healthy. Even though I know it’s their job, the way they treated me with dignity and respect will never be forgotten. I feel forever grateful to these humans.

When our son had surgery at 5 weeks old, the skilled surgical team carefully operated on our tiny newborn with care and precision. His doctors and nurses cared for him and even myself with such grace and kindness, I felt like we were a part of their family. Each time we left the hospital as a healthy family of three, I thought to myself—thank God. I am not super religious. But there are times you just have to look around and thank the universe or the powers that be for your happy ending. I was bursting with gratitude. I still am.

When our insurance covered our baby’s operation in full, and then assigned a registered nurse to call and check up on him and answer any questions I may have, I felt so grateful to have such wonderful healthcare coverage. Not having to worry about a stack of medical bills piling up allowed us to focus on the health of our son, and I never once took that for granted.

When I struggled transitioning into my new role as a mother, with sleepless nights and a fussy newborn, my friends and family that checked in on me meant more than I ever thought possible. I was fighting that good fight of staying afloat as a new mom. Everyone has their own busy life, their own struggles, their own good fight to fight, but the daily calls, texts, cards and even gifts we received, made me truly realize how loved we are. My friends and family love our baby like their own, and it shows. For that, I am so freakin’ grateful.

When I watched the news and saw a segment about a mother living out of her car with her babies, it made me appreciate the walls around me and the roof above my head. Our house is not a mansion by any means. It’s not featured in Better Homes & Gardens Magazine. There is plenty of updating my husband and I would love to complete eventually, but it’s our home. The first home our baby will know, the house that turned into a home the second that baby came home with us. The one small bathroom is the one I found out I was pregnant in. The same bathroom that has become “Bubbie’s Spa” during our baby’s nightly bath. Our house that won’t be home forever, but it’s filling up with memories by the day. For this humble home that keeps us warm and safe, I am so grateful.

There’s so much more I’m truly grateful for every day, but this post would be 15,000 pages long and likely get cheesy enough to cringe. I’m grateful for the gift if being able to have a child, the gift of health, the gift of feeling safe and protected and loved. The gift of feeling supported when I needed it most. I’m grateful for my husband who loves both me and our son unconditionally. Grateful for this postpartum body, no matter how I struggle with it, because it gave me my baby. I’m grateful for the bad days, because they taught me just how good the good days are. Not to say that I used to be an ungrateful person, but the little things are just a lot bigger now, and the big things, well, they’ll figure themselves out.